June 20th, 2006
|12:09 pm - It just gets worse and worse...|
And now we are up to Chapter 9 of the MsScribe epic.
And it has to be one of the most horrific accounts of fandom I have ever come across. Some pooor woman with cancer getting stomped on by a whole bunch of BNFs just because she asked one of them to link her fundraising website. After they had been going on about how fandom supports it's own and all that, too.
I don't think I have ever been so appalled by fandom as a whole. The things that were said...
(My apologies to Drakyndra for barging into her journal.)
I'm someone who thought that the original post regarding Heidi not wanting to post a link was unnecessary. While I do think that things could have been handled in a more diplomatic manner, it’s understandable that Heidi was reluctant to endorse a person and situation with which she had no familiarity. I hope that with that knowledge, you'll give me a chance and hear me out.
This is why people were angry. Christina was very ill. She was in the hospital at the time. Her daughter was only 19 and trying to get help for her mum. Then, all of a sudden, the two of them are attacked and insulted in their own journals and on JF, told that they’re liars and how DARE they ask for help from someone they don’t even know. It looked to many of us that it was all right for Heidi to ask strangers for donations for laptops, but when someone asked for help for something far more important, they were subjected to insults.
The exact nature of Christina’s illness is not the issue. She was ill. People knew she was ill. And they viciously attacked her anyway. That’s what made people angry. Wanting to defend your friends is understandable, but carrying on a fandom argument in the journal of a very sick woman is inexcusable. Only ONE of Heidi’s friends apologised when asked to take the argument elsewhere.
Please think about why people are angry. It’s not because Heidi refused to post a link. It’s because a sick woman and her daughter were viciously attacked for asking for help. When the people doing the attacking were asked to stop, they didn’t. When Heidi was asked to please tell her friends to stop, she didn’t.
Please, if you’re truly Heidi’s friend, then think about how all of this has made her look. How it has made you look. Remember that a true friend tells you what you need to hear, not what you want to hear. Being loyal to a friend doesn’t mean being blind to their mistakes. Take a step back and try to see this from another point of view. Right now, you’re quibbling over a very minor detail, and it’s making you look callous. I can understand that you might feel defensive but please think about how would you feel if all of this happened to someone you loved. The so-called Charitywank had me in tears because a young woman and her mother were being hurt for absolutely no reason other than stupid fandom drama.
I know this is long and I thank you for taking the time to read it. I completely admit to begging you to please, please think about why this situation makes me people so angry, both now and then. Re-read the comments explaining why, and try to see it from their points of view. Think about how you’d feel if this happened to someone you cared about.
Thanks for your time,